HETEROCHROMIA
By Angelina Vansen (angelina@gunmetaldark.com)

RATING: NC-17 for sexual and dark themes. Warnings here for both.
CODES: Uber J/7
SUMMARY: Set on present day Earth, local doctor Caitlyn Gunn (Janeway) has embarked on an intense affair with Tigerlily Abeyta (Seven of Nine) the fifteen year old daughter of her receptionist.


Chapter One: Caitlyn

Caitlyn's head is on her hands on the steering wheel. She doesn't know what she's doing.

It's raining outside and it looks like it's set in for the day; the whole sky is grey and moving. Or maybe it's just that she can't see out of the windows. Her breath steamed the whole car up a while back.

She is waiting for Tigerlily. She doesn't know why. She knows that it probably isn't a good idea, especially so publicly. So close to the town. It's madness. But whatever Tigerlily wants ...

Tigerlily knocks on the window. Shadowy in the rain and the mist, hugging herself with her arms in the way that she does.

Caitlyn sits up straight with a jump. Composing herself.

She unlocks the door to let her in, less than happy to see she is soaked to the skin. Her light brown hair is ratty and dripping, and her make-up is raccooned around her eyes.

"I walked from school," she mumbles to Caitlyn's incredulous stare.

Caitlyn only shakes her head as she starts the car.

She drives down the highway, putting some distance between them and the town. She drives through Orchington, through Samson. Stops at a shop to get a coke and some chocolate. Thinking about the CCTV and the speed cameras on the roads. Thinking about the girl from Tigerlily's class that was killed on the road last year. Her mind following those thoughts like a road.

The road only leads to one place: to Tigerlily. Thinking if that girl had been Tigerlily. How horrible. How could she have lived through that?

Caitlyn turns off onto the back roads to make her way to All Hallows.

The whole way, Tigerlily is silent. She doesn't even turn the radio on. She barely looks out of the windows, and she doesn't look at Caitlyn.

Caitlyn looks at Tigerlily's bare legs, spotted with rain. Her bare legs, her little white socks, her school skirt.

She stops, as she always does, at The Hacienda in All Hallows. Twenty miles away from home, off the beaten track. Where no one knows either of them. A shitty little dump of a motel where they ought to be grateful she rents a room three nights of the week. Where she hopes they need the money badly enough not to care what she does in it.

She leaves Tigerlily in the car while she runs to reception to get their key. She looks no one in the eye.

She drives them round to room 217 and parks. Tigerlily is chewing the insides of her cheeks as she gets out of the car. Sullen. But her eyes are blue and glistening, and she is trembling. She stands close to Caitlyn as she unlocks the door. Breath warm and rapid on the back of her neck.

Kissing as soon as the door is shut. Tigerlily's tongue warm and wet and breath hot. Her sandy brown hair in Caitlyn's hands, clenched into fists. Held. Eaten. Tigerlily's fingers unbuttoning her shirt.

"Oh God ..." Caitlyn groans. Tigerlily's mouth is so hot on her nipple. Biting it. Hurting it. Leaving it bright and stinging. Angry. A bite on her stomach, one on the side of her breast. Dragging the nipples with her teeth.

Caitlyn throws her on the bed. Roughly. Holds her hands down, resists her struggles. An assault, almost. Kisses her ferociously, not caring when their teeth crash and grind together, when she bites Tigerlily's tongue. Tastes her blood.

Under her school uniform, she is wearing a black bra. Lace and ribbon. She is beautiful, her breasts large and white, overspilling Caitlyn's palms as she crushes them, squeezes them. Wants them. Tigerlily is so firm, strong beneath her skin. Everywhere she touches her, she feels her youth, burning.

"Touch me," she moans.

Tigerlily turns her, sits on her and straddles her. Eyes on hers, large and arrogant. Burning blue. Lip gloss across her mouth and cheek.

Caitlyn slides her hands up her legs, under her skirt, over her smooth thighs. Digs her hands into the waistband of her black panties. She wants to rip them, but Tigerlily shifts to let them slide off.

Over again, so she is on top. Moving down, head under Tigerlily's skirt to eat her. Deeply into it, into her. Smothered by her thighs and her skirt and her own hair. Wrapping her arms around her legs, planting her hands on her hips. Lapping and lapping and lost.

Tigerlily arching, grasping the sheets. Gasping and thrusting and twisting her own nipples. Tasting of her youth, firm and ripe and sweet and juicy. Red like a perfect strawberry.

Tigerlily comes, a summer storm. Tossing and wild. Breasts shaking. Breath too much, but pale and composed. Not even sweaty. Contracting in her belly and thighs, over and over. Soft cries.

Caitlyn kisses back up to her mouth and tells her she is beautiful. Tigerlily licks her taste off Caitlyn's lips experimentally.

Caitlyn is aroused. Takes her own underpants off, guiding Tigerlily's fingers. Moans loudly at the first touch, rolls her head to bite the pillow.

Tigerlily bites her nipples, cruel. Nips them with her front teeth, chews them with the back ones. Eyes like slits holding hers. Gnawing. Clawing with her fingers, violent inside her. Almost too much, pressure on her bladder, stretching her. One too many fingers.

Caitlyn comes, a crack of thunder. Slamming against the bed. Teeth biting and hair in her mouth. The taste of salt on her tongue. The pain of it from her hips to her legs to her toes, over and over. The yell ripping her throat.

Afterwards, she needs to look for her drink before she can speak again. Her make up is smeared on the pillow.

Tigerlily is looking at herself in the mirror, moving her thick hazel hair out of her eyes. She takes the rest of her clothes off and drops them untidily on the chair.

Tigerlily likes to be naked.

Caitlyn hates it. She puts her shirt back on and sits under the sheet. She thinks of the patients she should be seeing right now. She thinks of the classes that Tigerlily is missing.

"Aren't you going to ask me?" says Tigerlily suddenly. Her tone is rather angry.

"What?" Caitlyn croaks. Voice thick from her passion.

"I called you and said I had to see you. I said it was an emergency. I didn't mean a come-fuck-me-now emergency."

Caitlyn winces at her language. It's sometimes too much. "Are you all right?" she asks.

Tigerlily just looks at her. Angry, obstinate. Mouth full of rage she won't speak. "No," she says. "I've had enough."

"Oh," says Caitlyn. Her voice seems very far away, even to herself. The blood is pounding. Is this what she thinks it is? She looks at her shoes on the floor and her keys on the table. She thinks of the long drive home with nothing to say. Dumped.

But then Tigerlily is taking her hands. Playfully enough, but there is a need in her eyes, an ache. The ache she had when they first met. When Tigerlily's love was just a little crush she laughed about. How long ago that seems.

"Caitlyn, we have to go," she says.

"Go?" she asks.

"We have to run away ..."

She starts to laugh, at her, with her, then stops. Tigerlily won't break eye contact. Her look is searching what she sees in Caitlyn's eyes.

"I can't stand it any more," she says. "It's choking me. That fucking narrow-minded town, every day the same old shit, same people, same buildings, same bullshit I have to listen to. It's such a hellhole!"

Caitlyn sighs. "It's a small town," she says. "I know ..."

"No, you don't!" Tigerlily shouts back at her. "It's all right for you, you're a fucking doctor, people treat you with respect!"

"They treat you with respect, too, Tigerlily," she chides.

"Bullshit," she snaps. "You don't know. You don't have to get up every morning knowing you've got to face a whole day with people taking the piss out of you. Making you angry deliberately. Calling you Weirdo and Virgin and Frog Girl!"

"Frog Girl?!" Caitlyn asks. "They call you Frog Girl?"

"Yes!"

It shouldn't be funny, but Caitlyn barely suppresses her laughter. "Why do they call you that?" she giggles.

"Because I look like a frog, okay? That's what they say. Because it upsets me and it pisses me off, and that's their fucking mission in life!"

"They shouldn't do that to you," she says. "Have you told your mother?"

"So she can do what? Go to the school and make it worse? I don't think so."

They fall into silence. Tigerlily's lip trembles, and she is clearly holding back a throat full of tears.

All this seems so far away for Caitlyn. She doesn't know what to say.

Things had been different for her. She'd gone to an elite single sex school where she'd been Head Girl. She had been good at everything, popular and well-liked. She'd had many friends, some of whom she's kept in touch with to this day. No one had ever called her Frog Girl.

"I can't stand it any more," Tigerlily says eventually, in a small voice so full of anger. "I love you Caitlyn, I want to be with you, and look ... we can't even do that without having to drive twenty miles!"

"I know," Caitlyn whispers. "I hate it too. But we don't have a lot of choice."

"Yes we do," Tigerlily growls. "We DO have choice, Cait. We could live anywhere we wanted. Somewhere far away."

"That's not practical."

"Bullshit. It would be easy. I've been thinking about it. We could just run, get away from it all, go to another country and keep on the move. See the world. Didn't you say you wished you'd seen more of the world?"

"Yes, but ..."

"But what? Why don't we do it? Don't you want to see it with me?"

"You know I do. And we will ... someday. But now ..."

"No, I can't stand it any longer. I can't do it. You don't know what it's like for me. All I think about all day is you. Don't you know how mundane ... how fucking ordinary you've made the rest of my life seem?"

Caitlyn does know. She feels it too. Some days she too thinks of little else but Tigerlily. Everything, her whole life, seems so dull by comparison. The practice she's spent years building up, her friends, her dogs. The car she saved hard for. The house she's been refurbishing. None of these give her satisfaction any more.

She thinks about what it might be like, running away with Tigerlily. Sharing the world with her. Sharing her life. Watching her every minute of the day, being able to touch her beauty.

She is right in a lot of ways, especially about the town. She is being smothered there. Tigerlily is fiercely intelligent, in a way that no one at her school has seemed to recognise or attempt to nurture. She IS going to waste.

And all that ... all that potential and fierce creative energy ... Caitlyn often watches as it turns to rage and frustration. She hates it.

There was a whole world out there, after all. A whole world. Part of her wants to spread Tigerlily out over that world, drink from her in every place she can.

But she should have ended this long ago, as well. Part of her thinks this has been a symptom of the madness her mother struggled with her whole life.

She's worried about that, too. A lot.

Tigerlily's fifteen. Fifteen. She's a child, beneath her glossy lips and voluptuous bosom, young enough to be her daughter by a long way. She's not old enough to drink or smoke or drive a car. She's not old enough to consent to the things they've both done here. Caitlyn's often wondered exactly what she thinks she's playing at.

But she can't help it. She's lost. Crazy. Sure, she's not attacking the neighbours with a shovel like her mother, but each one to her own. Everyone should have their own insanity.

She takes Tigerlily's hand. She holds it. Squeezes it. Holds those long fingers between hers, imagining them slipping forever from her grasp. She doesn't know what she'd do.

"I do love you," she tells her. "You know how much I love you."

"Then do it. Take me away. Show me ..."

But she can't do that. Puts her fingers over Tigerlily's lips. "You shouldn't say that. You mustn't. It's so impossible."

Tigerlily is shaking her head. Moving away from Caitlyn's hand. "That's bullshit," she says. That same rage. That same frustration, burning her up. "That's your fear."

"No. No, darling, it's reality. This ... this is wonderful and you know how I feel, but we couldn't ..."

"Why not?!" Tigerlily was practically screaming at her now.

"Because even though we live in a small-minded town where we are surrounded by people who will never accept the way we feel, that is LIFE. There are always places like that. The world is full of them. It's a noble fantasy, but upping sticks and running away together is not going to solve a thing for either of us. It'll make things worse."

"How?" Tigerlily spits. She always has this face on when she thinks Caitlyn is patronising her. Mothering her.

"Because we will be hunted down, for one thing. And when I say "we", I mean "me". You're a minor, and I'd be abducting you."

"You don't need to abduct me! I can think for myself."

Caitlyn shakes her head. "How long till you're sixteen?"

"October."

"That's six months."

"Yes, it is. That's all."

"Well, in six months ..."

"I'm not going to last six months."

That stops Caitlyn short. "What?" she asks. There is something in Tigerlily's face.

"I walked out of school today. I'm not going back. Whatever. That's why I called you. This isn't some schoolgirl adventure I thought up. I mean it. I can't do it any more."

"Tiger ..."

"I CAN'T do it any more. I'm not going home to be ignored by my mother, I'm not going to school to be ignored by my teachers and abused by those bitches all day."

"Come on, you have to ..."

"No! Why won't you get it?!"

"Because it's insanity! What the hell are you going to do?"

"I'm going to run away with you."

"Stop it ..."

"And if you won't, then there really isn't any point, is there."

"What does that mean?"

Tigerlily reaches down, picks up her bag from the floor by the bed. She opens it and puts her hand inside. "It means my father had a gun," she says.

She brings it out, a stubby little handgun.

Caitlyn backs away instinctively. Moves off the bed.

"It means," Tigerlily continues, "that I don't want to live any more."

"You don't mean that," Caitlyn says from near the door. "Look at you, you ... you're so beautiful, so perfect ... you have so much ..."

"I'm in so much pain," she starts to cry. "You don't know. You have no idea. I can't do it any more. This is the end of the line."

Tigerlily breaks down then, lifting a hand to cover her face as she sobs. Deep, choking sobs that shake her like her orgasms. The gun is limp in her limp hand.

For a second, Caitlyn thinks of it. She can't help it. She sees Tigerlily, naked and dead. Her body splattered with blood, not moving. Cold. She sees her in her coffin, eyes glued shut, in a satin gown, wound repaired. Coming to kiss her goodbye in her coffin, giving her a flower, her ring, something to take with her.

She imagines herself going home, waking in the middle of the night scared. She could never stand the thought of Tigerlily buried in the ground. She knows she couldn't live with that.

She goes to her, gets back on the bed, not caring now that she is naked from the waist down. Reaches out to Tigerlily.

"Come on," she says. "Come on ..."

Tigerlily won't stop crying. She doesn't stop as Caitlyn dresses both of them, cleans the room a little. She sobs into her hands. Her hair hangs about her face. She doesn't lift her head.

She doesn't even protest as Caitlyn takes the gun from her, hides it in her own bag as she takes it to the car to shut it in the glove box. There. There and not forgotten. Always the promise of Tigerlily's death between them, sitting there so ugly it hurts.

Caitlyn gets her bag and pulls Tigerlily out into the grey day again. Sits her in the car. Has to swing her legs in herself. She's too far gone.

She finds her keys and starts the car with trembling fingers. Fingers that still smell a little of Tigerlily's sex. She leaves The Hacienda, turns North on the road out of there. Drives. Keeps driving to the sound of Tigerlily's crying.

Eventually, she doesn't cry any more. She is looking out of the windows, looking to see where they are. She doesn't look like she's recognising anything.

"Where are we going?" she asks after a few minutes.

Caitlyn chews her lip. "I don't know," she says. "I got absolutely no fucking idea whatsoever."

CONTINUE TO CHAPTER TWO ...


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